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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28262838">Every moon in the stars</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/simofthewind/pseuds/simofthewind'>simofthewind</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A lot of softness actually, Kaer Morhen, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, There's also an alpaca, They love each other, and there's nothing any of them can do about it, soft</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:28:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,106</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28262838</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/simofthewind/pseuds/simofthewind</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Eskel loves Jaskier and Jaskier loves him too.<br/>But the witcher is conflicted about his feelings and it's up to the bard to show him the strength and beauty of what their hearts are feeling.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eskel &amp; Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Eskel &amp; Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia &amp; Jaskier | Dandelion, Eskel &amp; Jaskier | Dandelion, Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Eskel/Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia &amp; Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>39</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Every moon in the stars</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is a winter gift for <a href="https://myidlehand.tumblr.com/">Myidlehand</a> , you know why my dear.<br/>Thank you so much Starry Lov ;) for your beta and advices.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Yule night, the winter solstice, the longest night of all. Her silent and heavy cape of cold and snow, dark blue and soft, is draped upon every creek and hollow, mountain and meadow of the land.  </p><p>It was Yule night, the winter solstice, the longest night of all and in her arms slept a lost keep, its grey stoned walls, old and tired somewhere in a mountain.  </p><p>It was Yule night, the winter solstice, the longest night of all and in this keep, entwined, warmed by a low fire, laid two men. Shining with love and sweat, their dark hair are drawing a halo on the pale pillows. The feather-like fingers of the musician are tracing the scars of his lover’s face, the ones deforming every smile and laugh, every eye wrinkle. The ones born from love, hatred, cowardice, and bravery. The testimony of the man’s life and heart. The moon and her stars were shining bright, their cristal laughs carried away by the wind of the Yule night. </p><p>It was Yule night, the winter solstice, the longest night of all, and a bard loved a witcher. He sang and hummed while his caresses were drawing unknown letters on the witcher’s scarred skin. </p><p>Can you hear the mad wind, jealous lover, riding the Earth endlessly, mmm, mmmm mmmmmm mmm.... </p><p>The witcher is a man of impressive build, hard muscles hidden under a soft and protective layer of fat. He might look like a bear but his school is the one of the wolves roaming the lands. He’s one of the very last wolves of Kaer Morhen, fierce, reliable, fast, silent. His medallion is resting on his dark chest. His strong arms are wrapped around the sturdy waist of his singing lover... </p><p>Can you hear the mad wind, jealous lover, mmmm, mmm... </p><p>He tightened his hold around him a bit more and hid his face in his neck, nuzzling the soft skin of his underjaw just here. It’s been a long time since they last saw each other. </p><p>“Jaskier,… what about Geralt ?” </p><p>“What about him ?” yawned the bard. </p><p>A silence. “Eskel, what about him?” </p><p>“You’re singing about the jealous wind in love, mad with it. I know he loves you, his fire for you is steady and strong, Jaskier. He has never loved so before. I know it, I know him. Does, does he know you... Did you tell him, about you and me, that we... I mean...” A shaky breath, eyes closed “Jaskier, does he know?” </p><p>He scrunched his nose, and straightened up, gently pulling himself out of Eskel’s embrace, his hair almost golden in the fire glow. </p><p>“Eskel… open your eyes for me, my love. My love, don't you know?”   </p><p>He peered into those dark, dark yellow eyes almost brown in the low light and studied the frown disappearing into the soft brown hair.  </p><p>“Don’t you know Eskel, how much Geralt feels for you?” </p><p>“He loves you Jaskier. He does. So much. And his stories about you, the light in him because of you, well, it made me fall for you, in a way...”  </p><p>“Eskel, and he made me fall for you too. His stories about you, the light in him when speaking of you. My poet. I knew you before knowing you.” </p><p>The bard grabbed the paw-like hand of his fragile and strong lover and interlaced their fingers. </p><p>“Eskel, he has loved you for so much longer than I  have loved him.” A kiss on the thick knuckles. “And I have loved him for so much longer than I have loved you. But it doesn't matter.” </p><p>He settled his hand carefully on the witcher’s chest, flat and smooth despite the lute callous and exactly above his heart that beats slowly, so slowly... And the wind is still howling outside. It’s Yule night, the longest of all. </p><p>“Love is what counts, Witcher... Love is the only thing that matters. Are my feelings any different than if I’ve known you for centuries? They’re not. Love is I’ve known you for all my life, for centuries and eternity. Love is I’ve been waiting for you, walking the Earth unknowingly to find you someday... Love is eternity. You’re part of my Path, part of my life, part of my soul. You are. And he is. Both of you in a completely different and yet the same way. He knows that. He does Eskel. And he feels the same.” </p><p>And slowly Jaskier settled back between the witcher’s arms. Resting his head on his heart. Like he belonged there. </p><p>“ Don't you feel how our energies are beating in harmony ?” </p><p>“ I do. I do. I thought… I thought it was just me, that I was imagining it. I saw you and Geralt. Geralt, my wolf, my brother, my…” He could feel his hand bruising the soft flesh of his bard’s hip and tried to relax it... </p><p>“Yours. Yours, Eskel. I know how you love him. There’s no need to hide your heart from me, my love. I know its truth. Yours.” </p><p>“Yes…” he whispered, “Mine. For so long it was just the two of us, you know. Before the trials, the older witchers couldn't tell us apart. We were... one. </p><p>And then, then,... there had been life and an ocean of silence and looks and misplaced anger and hurt in between. I was afraid, Jaskier, so. I had no right to love him. And, and...” </p><p>“It’s okay, my darling, it’s okay...” and he placed a butterfly kiss on his chin, and another at the corner of his mouth “it’s okay, take your time.” </p><p>“And I pushed him away every time I saw myself quiver under his silent concern and his soft worry. And when the world definitively turned against him after Blaviken, I was unable to reach him through the walls he had build around himself. Geralt… He has always been quiet even when he was younger. He’s so much with his whines, grand philosophical opinions, and loud dreams and hopes and yet… so, so quiet in a way? But it was not just that anymore. It was carefully build walls, thick and dark, so dark... And I was helpless at their foot. And then you came, young frivolous man out of nowhere, fresh like a bead of rose… and you broke down these walls, brick by brick, blowing on the dusty cement. And he was almost here again. When he came back for winter he had this lightness in his steps, this lightning in his smiles and jokes. He was as well-fed as one on the road could be, soft white silvery hair, soft tired smile. He was... beautiful.” </p><p>“He is...” breathed the bard, curling closer into his lover's warm body.</p><p>“Do you know Jaskier how I hated you for that? For making him happy as I could never, for making his heart warm, his smile bright and his swords precise and assured? But I loved you so at the same time for these exact reasons... And I thought let him go. Now, see how himself he almost is again. Hear the tunes hummed under his breath, hear how he speaks of him, see how happiness suits him... Forget your heart. That’s what I thought, that’s what I kept repeating to myself winter after winter, but...” </p><p>“You love him.” </p><p>“I do. And he, loves you.” </p><p>“He does.” </p><p>“And you love him.”   </p><p>“I do.” </p><p>“We met and… “ </p><p>“And my perfect body, angelic voice, and dark eyelash made it for you, is that it?” </p><p>“What? No! What are talking abo... Oh no, no stop that, Jaskier, stop” but the bard was cruelly ignoring him, tickling the tender spot above his right hip, and everywhere he could reach, giggling lightly at how the fierce hunter was wiggling in vain between his thighs “would you stop that now, you stupid bard, stop I said. Since when do you giggle like a brainless maiden, ngh, stop, you heartless idiot” and at last Eskel managed to grab the strong wrists and held them captive above his own head, high on the pillows.  </p><p>Chest to chest, honey eyes in sea blue ones, humid heavy breaths shared in the small space between their smiles and the bard flopping dark hair. </p><p>They stayed here for a long time, as long as a Yule night. </p><p>“Stop it Jaskier,... I was serious” </p><p>And Jaskier, he closed his eyes and kissed his witcher slowly, softly, like the most fragile secret laid bare, let his lips linger and as slowly, detached them from his... </p><p>“I know you are. You love him Eskel. And I love you Eskel. Don't ever forget that.” </p><p>“I’m not the White Wolf, Jaskier. I’m just a witcher. But I thought I could be him, a bit, for you. I wanted to have you like he had. I wanted to be loved by you like he had. And I felt miserable for that... It was the furthest thing I wanted. I wanted you to love me, for me, for who I was…”</p><p>“I know. And you’re so very much like him. Scarred by life and combats, by yourself. Scared of yourself. Feeling so much and far too intelligent for your own good. Soft under all these hard muscles. Connected to animals and nature... Even some of your mimics are the same. You’re two sides of the same coin. Your souls are the same. And he’s so much more than you... and you’re so much more than him. </p><p>Your lives are different, your feelings are different, your hearts are... your hopes and desires, your fears, your favorite sword moves, everything and anything in you both is so unique to cherish and so beautifully you... </p><p>Eskel, when we met, when I met you, you were the one I wanted, the one I needed, without knowing it. Not Geralt. Not anyone else. It was you. I had a void inside me that I didn't know you fit perfectly. I don’t love you because I love him, but you, you are the one I missed… I knew it was you that I‘ve been missing all along... and I learned to love you for more than Geralt’s tales about you. And it was you. Only you.  </p><p>My sweet brave witcher you’re not the White Wolf. You’re not Geralt, and you’ll never be. And I never ever want you to be. Each life, each beat of heart is so unique. Geralt is my first true love but my heart is big enough for more than one. Your flame is burning so high and so proud, how could anyone, how could I want you to be someone else. You’re you with all your flaws and with all your virtues. And that’s why I love you.  </p><p>Oh no my darling, chase those tears from your eyes, I do.” </p><p>Freed from his lover’s grasp, his fingers were caressing his rough cheeks, his brow, smoothing back the straight and silky strands of hair. </p><p>“You’re mine, the both of you. I will never love you like I love him, Eskel. And I will never love him like I love you. Do you, do you understand ?” </p><p>“I do. I do.” </p><p>“You’re you and he’s him. Every love is different, every life, every person, every joy, every cry, every shout, every voice, every music is different. Every shining sun, every storm. The stars who made us are different. I love him and I love you. I know it can seem strange but my heart beats for you both, do you understand? Do you? My love is endless. Eskel, do you know how much I hurt and burn for you both? Please, my love, say some- humpf...” </p><p>For as long as time has existed, for as long as a Yule night can be, there had never been a better or more efficient way to reduce a loved one to silence than a stolen kiss. Hot, desperate, fierce and tender were the lips of Eskel on his bard’s, his strong nose digging into Jaskiers’s pale cheek, his hands tugging sharply where they were buried in the short wavy brand strand of hair. </p><p>He kissed him, again and again, pouring his heart in every nip and bite, every caress of his tongue, every breath shared... He kissed him. </p><p>“I do. I do. I do.”  </p><p>He kissed him. </p><p>“I feel it too, Jaskier. You and Geralt, souls of my soul, lights of my life, I understand, I know. I feel it too. </p><p>I love you and I love him Jaskier” </p><p>“I love you and I love him Eskel...” </p><p>A shared smile. “... and he loves us both. No, don’t hide, come, come, my dear, the sun will not wake up soon, we have eternity for us, I have something to show you, come on...” </p><p>He jumped out of the bed, gathering clumsily the clothes they had discarded when the Yule night was young and feverish. Hair wild, pink cheeks and sparkling eyes, bright red hoses on, a long white nightdress hastily covered by a deep blue woolen doublet, Jaskier was a sight Eskel was unable to resist to.  </p><p>He shook his head fondly and with much more care and method, the witcher dressed up, putting a plain green shirt on, with a thick darker vest over slack brown pants and his faithful leather boots. The last loop passed, and the last string tied Jaskier grabbed his wrist tightly and pulled him out of the bedroom, along the cold corridor. Across stairs and empty halls full of night he urged him, until they arrived into the courtyard covered in snow and stars, their hot breath swirling white around them. </p><p>The stable was lit, torches and lanterns projecting a warm light into the doorway. </p><p>The witcher halted, easily stoping the bard’s attempt to drag him closer to the low building. He turned his wrist to squeeze his hand gently.</p><p>“What the... No Jaskier, we can’t go out in this weather, it would be too dangerous both for us and for the horses. The night is too dark even with the Moon, later maybe, Jaskier, not now.” He cliqued his tongue “Since when are the candles burning inside? Did you lit them before coming to me? You know they’re precious, we can't waste wax like that, the winter is just beginning... who is here! Show your face!” </p><p>A happy laugh resonated in the night and the bard pressed a small kiss on the scarres marring his witcher’s face. </p><p>“Shhh, Eskel, it’s your surprise. Close your eyes for me, love, please? There you are, my dear. I know, I know, you don't like surprises, stop mumbling for a minute, right? You will like this one! Or I hope so... Don't cheat! Keep your eyes closed! </p><p>Geralt, Geralt my wolf, we’re here!” </p><p>The bard’s excitement was palpable in the cold air, filling it with a buzzing energy, almost sparkly on his tongue. Eskel licked his lips and shifted his weight, arms crossed over his chest, waiting, eyes closed. </p><p>There were hushed whispers and soon he heard the recognizable step of the White Wolf, sure, light despite his weight and imperceptibly favoring his left side, clear in the night. And following, other steps, unsure, clicking on the old stones of the keep. </p><p>A gruff voice, that had always send chills down his spine. Geralt. “You can open your eyes, Eskel” </p><p>And he did. </p><p>“We discovered her during one of our journeys, the merchant said it’s an alpaca? Or something like that... Anyways, he said he didn't want her anymore, said she was too stubborn, so we brought her back here. For you. Geralt thought that you’d like her... Right, Geralt?”  </p><p>“She’s very gentle, curious, and attentive. She’s very strong headed and smart.” The deep voice became hesitant here “She, well, she looks a bit like you… She could keep company to your goat? You... you can touch her if you want, her muzzle is very soft." </p><p>“More than Roach's?” </p><p>“Wha..? Shut up Jask!” </p><p>“My darling wolf. Don't worry I know Roach is the only true one in that heart of yours." </p><p>But Eskel was no longer listening to them, his full concentration on the strange creature in front of him. She had very thin legs firmly planted in the ground and a long elegant neck. A thick chocolate fur covered her entire body except for her head on top of which it ended in a wild fuzzy mop. The creature would have looked ridiculous but the big black eyes lined with soft, long eyelashes were hiding a rare intelligence and infinite wisdom.  </p><p>A trembling breath left him as he tentatively extended his hand in front of him, palm open, offered, and the alpaca stretched out her neck gently to sniff it curiously, her deep eyes not leaving his. Then, as delicately as a snowflake landing on a rosy cheek, she placed her muzzle against the open palm and closed her eyes for a brief moment.  </p><p>A smile bloomed on his torn lips and he sniffed, trying to blink away the blur in his eyes. He met the warm yellow of Geralt’s, and Jaskier’s, shining bright blue with hope. The two of them were huddled against each other, Geralt’s arm around the bard waist. </p><p>He took a step back as the alpaca turned around, back into the warm stable. </p><p>There was no amount of stars in the night that could compete with the love he felt on this winter night. He was so full of it he thought he couldn't feel more than the one beating furiously in his chest, tearing at his seams. </p><p>Until he saw their open arms.  </p><p>And he found himself falling in, closing their embrace and burying his face in the long white hair and wild brown curls of the two men his heart was beating for, deeply breathing their scent in.  </p><p>After a moment, Geralt broke their warm hug and slipped a hand on his jaw, tenderly. He drew closer and placed a gentle cold kiss at the corner of his mouth, then after a breath of hesitation, another one... He withdrew a bit awkwardly offering a small sheepish smile: </p><p>“ Merry Yule Eskel, and happy birthday...” </p><p>And Jaskier tightened his hold around his two wolves, shielding them from the outside world, listening to the mad wind, jealous lover of the Yule night, riding every creek and hollow, mountain and meadow of the land... </p><p>It was Yule night, the winter solstice, the longest night of all and in a courtyard of an old keep, lost somewhere in a mountain, under the starry vault of the night sky, three men, a wild spirit and two wolf-hearted warriors loved each other.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Can you hear the mad wind, jealous lover, riding the Earth endlessly,  is an old french winter lullaby, that you can find <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYgBqOPop5A">here</a></p><p>Come say hi on <a href="https://simeramise.tumblr.com/">Tumblr!</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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